Rage Against the Machine

The Fashion Machine that is... I found this article the other day on Facebook and had to share it with my Facebook buddies, but it has been on my mind ever since and so I decided to blog about it. You can read the article thingy here (and definitely go through all 29 or so pages, as annoying as it is.) I couldn't believe my eyes as I read through this. I mean I guess I could in a way, being what is considered a "plus size" model (even though I absolutely refuse to answer to this ridiculous name or participate in anything that is geared toward that phrase) because I have first hand experience with the rejections and so forth on the fact that I am not "skinny" and "model-sized" blah blah blah. But still, reading this and seeing the comments and the reactions of an industry that is all about making people beautiful disgusts me. I know I'm an idealist or some such thing for thinking that they would want everyone to be beautiful and not just the rail thin girls but that IS what I think. Things that stuck out in my mind from the article are things like "No one wants to see a round woman" and beautiful photos of curvy women that are lowered by giant bowls of food in the pic or "The thigh's the limit" comments. And how bout people quitting a runway show when there were plus sized models involved?? What is that all about?!? I did a web search and the general consensus that I found is that the average American woman is about a size 14. (which by the way, is 2-3 sizes ABOVE what is considered a "plus size" model) Why are designers NOT working their asses off to cater to the largest sales demographic? My personal opinion is that they are lazy and taking the easy way out. I mean think about it. How easy is it to design a piece of clothing for a Person so skinny that its like hanging it on a hanger? Of course its going to flow perfectly and fit just right because there isn't anything to worry about. Now think of how challenging it is to take a woman full of gorgeous curves and create a piece of clothing that flows just right and fits perfectly. Why aren't designers challenging themselves? Why are they taking the easy road? Why are the majority of plus size breakthroughs happening in other countries? We are a country full of gorgeous curvy women, why aren't we embracing that??? I want to put a little insert here saying that I am not in any way against thin, skinny, or typical model sized ladies. I think we are all amazing regardless of our body type and size. I just think that is about damn time that somebody starts catering to the norm and NOT the few. But than I already said I know its idealistic right??
So now, here is a picture of a curvy woman (namely, ME) isn't it horrendous and awful? Shouldn't there be less of this in the world?


*photo by the amazing Siofra Photography

The FACE

Ok so this totally wasn't the blog that I was planning on writing tonight but since it showed up today in real life and is pretty much one of my favorite things ever I decided to put off the other blog I was going to write for later. So this happens to be another Jenna Marbles blog which I REALLY wasn't going to do for awhile (especially since right this moment I am a bit disappointed in Ms. Marbles) but what can I say. After today I just have to.

So a co-worker and I somehow started talking about going dancing at clubs and that led to the creepy guy sneaking up behind you and starting to grind all over you. Which of course led to the discussion of the best way to get rid of said creepy guy who is now ALL UP IN YOUR BUSINESS and of course the first thing that came to mind is THE FACE. For those of you who don't know what I am talking about you need to watch this video. You can thank me later for making your lives infinitely more amazing (I accept sparkly, pink and/or princess type things. And of course $, cause what can I say? I'm broke) Now watch the video!!!!

 Now that you are all deeply in debt to me for showing you this beautiful gem of greatness I figured the only appropriate way to  write this blog is to make it interactive. That's right, I want you all to do your very best FACE and add it as a comment to my blog. I think the awesomeness of this will know no bounds! To get you started off right, here is my very own version of the FACE:

Part one

So I was going to smooth all of the past few days into one blog but I have decided to divide it into two. Partly because I am having to write this on my phone and not my computer and partly because what I was afraid of happening has happened. I was worried about switching over to only writing three or four posts a week instead of every day because it gives me a ready made excuse NOT to write, and since I have had this excuse I haven't written in like five days.... Poop. This way I clearly have to write another blog and sooner rather than later while the details are still fresh in my mind. So be looking for part two in a day or so. Before I start writing about my actual topic I have to tell you about a bit of ridiculousness. I absolutely love when you take a super toasty shower and when you get out your whole body is steaming! It's so cool! And every single time, like an idiot I think "damn I'm hot!" Ok on to the real thing.

the past few dats have been chock full of goodness involving a few of the most important people in my life. So I know it is a few days late but I have to say happy mommy's day. When I think about parents there have been some decidedly crap-tastic things (losing both of my incredibly amazing dads two years apart would top the list) but then there have been some pretty amazing things as well. I was fortunate  enough to find a friend who was willing to become basically a part of my family and act as a surrogate dad for me. Beyond all of that, I was the luckiest girl ever to be born to the mommy that I have. She is amazing. I couldn't ask for more. But then, surprisingly enough, I got more!! One of my bestest friends' mommy became best friends with my mommy and then she became my other mommy (not as in they are in a Relationship together, just that we all became each others families) And so they became the mommies. How cool is that? And two better role models you couldn't find. And believe me, the good times (and the CRAZY) roll when we get together. And we all got together for dinner on mommies day. I will sum it up with just telling you that we left with 4 plastic Mailbu rum sand pails that started out full of alcoholic beverages. Anyways the long and short of all this is that I am one damn lucky girl and I love my mommies. 

Attack of the Killer App

So now that I pouted for a couple of days and then ended up away from home until late at night for quite a few days in a row I am finally back to entertain all of you, my fabulous bloggy babies! First things first. Clearly my life is a bit busier than I really thought it was and I keep missing days of bloggy goodness. So I have made the decision to only blog three to four days a week instead of everyday. This way you guys don't have to read boring blogs that I try to come up with with no time or me saying that I don't have anything to blog about and I will not feel guilty for not writing everyday. So there you go. That is the first of the important business.

On to what I was actually going to blog about. So I was pouting the other day because when I asked everyone to read my blog to make me into a happy little lamb NO ONE read my blog. Then as I was pouting I watched an episode of Futurama called Attack of the Killer App (Season 6, Episode 3, its available on Netflix) and it made it all make sense. The episode is all about how Bender and Fry get new Eyephones and decide to try to be the first person to get 1 million followers (aka Twats) on their Twitcher accounts. Bender is way in the lead do to his Twits that are full of idiotic things and videos and Fry only gets a bunch of followers when he sells out one of his friends and posts a horrible video of her. Whenever he posts things he actually cares about he loses twats. And all of this struck so close to home it is ridiculous. The two highest read posts that I have are about 1: drinking till your an idiot and 2: being super fat. Any posts that are about anything I actually care about get like no readers. Hmm, I wonder how many views this one will get ya? ;)

Oops

So I was going to quit pouting and actually write a blog tonight but I ended up getting home pretty much at bedtime. So I will see you all tomorrow. With an actual blog full of bloggy goodness!!!

What Really Grinds My Gears

I am going to have a Peter Griffin moment hear and tell you what really grinds my gears.

So every night while I am lying in bed trying to get to sleep and basically trying to get my brain to shut the hell up I always end up having these great ideas for blogs. I even end up with the beginnings of the blog and they sound amazing and I am super excited about them. And then of course by the time morning rolls around I can't remember any of it. It seems like it should be easy, just write it down when I think about it laying there trying to sleep, right? The problem with that is that I'm trying to sleep, and if I wake up enough to write it all down I will have to start all over again with trying to get my brain to shut up! Argh! It is completely unfair. Maybe I will figure it out at some point, and if not than you will have to continue settling for the awesomeness that I keep putting forth!